February 14, 2012
74-Year-Old Man Busted For Prostitution
Wow, the economy is so bad that even senior citizens are delving into the world's oldest profession.
74-year-old Thomas Mills of Myrtle Beach, S.C., was busted for prostitution when the retired senior offered to perform oral sex on two male undercover police officers. Mills flashed his headlights to get their attention around 2:15 in the a.m. Aside from the fact that it's a wonder that a person that old was even awake after 4 p.m., let's applaud him for wanting to get his money--by any means necessary.
According to the police report Mills asked about the "size of the officers genitals" before asking to take a look for himself. Just to make things more interesting, he also offered to both give and receive fellatio, as well as let his other friend join in (yes, that would be a foursome, and yes that is incredibly awkward).
Mills was arrested on a misdemeanor prostitution charge. If he would've just applied for a job as a door greeter at Wal-Mart --like everyone else his age-- he probably wouldn't be in this mess, but you live and you learn.